As you walk closer to Jesus, does your family think you might be taking things a little too far?
I remember my dad telling me to get married to a nice guy who treated me well, even if he didn’t share the same faith as I did.
But I chose to wait on God and His timing to bring a husband into my life! I waited 14 years!! Yes, it’s true.
My dad truly thought I was from another planet when he saw me wait year after year for God to bring a husband in my life. He thought I was taking my faith in Jesus too seriously.
My dad was not a believer at the time. His advice to me did not line up with what God’s Word said about marriage which are:
2 Corinthians 6:14 – “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”
Ecclesiastes 4:12 – “A cord of three stands is not quickly broken.”
Ephesians 5:25 – “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”
I thought if my future husband and I don’t share the same spiritual foundation, life will be super tough!! Growing up in a home with only one parent being a Christian, I saw the real-life day to day struggles in marriage. I also thought…how could a non-believing husband understand spiritual truths? He just couldn’t. I would have rather stayed single than compromise by beliefs.
How about you? Is a family member of yours who isn’t a believer just yet, telling you to do something that does not line up with scripture?
The Reward for Waiting!
I was so thankful I waited for God’s best! He knew my husband and I would be the best match for one another. I have been married for over 18 years, and I can honestly say, ‘he was worth the wait!” I would do it all over again! God’s timing is best! I couldn’t imagine doing life with anyone else other than my husband.
God’s Word vs What Family Recommends
If you truly want to know what to do in a situation and you are one of the first believers in your family, I recommend for you to do the following:
- Find out what God’s Word says about the topic
- Seek out godly counsel
- Talk to someone on staff at your Bible believing church
- Be respectful and loving towards family members if their advice is different from what the Bible says
As a new believer, the fail-safe is to obey GOD’s Word…whatever it says! God loves you and knows what is best for you!
Heavenly Father vs Earthly Father
Even though my earthly dad loved me very much, his advice did not line up with what God’s word said to do about marriage. My dad was looking at the current situation which is my singleness. God was looking at
- my future
- the quality of my marriage and
- my future legacy
When you have the same spiritual foundation as your spouse:
- it’s easier to make major decisions
- it’s easier to make minor decisions
- you have more in common
- as you grow closer to God, you grow closer one another
Marriage is only one example of the many areas that family could disagree with you about what God’s Word says.
How Some Family Members May React to Your New Faith
- They make fun of you
- They think “You Do You” and “I’ll do what’s best for me”
- They don’t say anything
- They attack you
- They give you advice that is opposite of what the Bible says
Did you Know…
Unsaved family members are spiritually blind to the truth of God’s Word. This can be heartbreaking to watch your loved one’s struggle to see what we know to be true.
Our loved ones aren’t doing it on purpose; they really cannot see the truth! God’s Word says so.
1 Corinthians 2:14 – “The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that comes from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit.”
Feeling Attacked?
Growing up in a non-Christian family, there can be times when family members attack your faith as you continue to grow closer to Jesus. This is very normal.
2 Corinthians 2:15 -16 – “For we are to God the pleasing aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are an aroma that brings death; to the other, an aroma that brings life. And who is equal to such a task?”
Do you have family members who attack your faith in God? You are not alone! God Wants Your Loved Ones Saved!
One thing to know for sure is that God not only loves you but each of your family members, as well. No matter what choices your family members have made in the past, good or not so good; God loves them just the same.
God doesn’t want anyone in your family to perish without knowing Him. Here are some verses that could bring you comfort knowing this.
2 Peter 3:9 – “The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead, He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”
Luke 19:10 – “For the Son of Man came to seek and saved the lost.”
John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world that He gave His One and Only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
God is into Saving Households!!!
As the decades passed, God continued to add loved ones in my family one by one to my spiritual family. God is so amazing!!
It all started with my mom, but God slowly added the following family members to my spiritual family:
- my aunt
- my siblings (sister and brother) and myself
- my cousins
- my stepdad
- my Grandpa
- my dad
- Our daughter’s birth family (birth grandma and spouse)
- my uncle
Seeing family members above saved didn’t happen overnight, but over time and a lot of prayer I saw God move into the hearts of my loved ones and change their lives from the inside out. I prayed for…
- my Grandpa for over 12 years
- my Dad for over 14 years
- my Uncle for over 23 years
My Grandpa was 85 yrs old the first time he accepted Jesus as his Savior and 90 years old the second time. My Grandpa forgot the first time and wanted to make sure he would receive eternal life with Jesus. So the second time, he was around 90 years old. My Dad was 64 years old when he accepted Jesus as Savior and my uncle (my Dad’s identical twin) accepted Christ when he was 82 years old!
God hears each of your prayers! Keep praying! Prayer works!
How Should You Respond to Your Family When They Don’t Understand Your Faith?
- Pray for them (all the time)
- Stay calm
- Be kind
- Show them God’s love (actions speak louder than words)
- Share God’s truth with little words
- Don’t preach at them
- Pray for God to reveal Himself to them
- Pray for God to draw your loved ones closer to Himself
- Pray God unveils your loved one’s eyes to see His truth
John 14:6 – “Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
John 6:44 – “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.”
God is the one who draws us closer to Himself. God is the one who opens up our eyes to His truth!
All verses are NIV unless otherwise specified.
REFLECTION QUESTIONS FOR YOU:
- Who in your family would make a great Christian?
- Who in your family would you love to see saved?
- Who in your family seems like a long shot that they would ever accept Jesus?
- Who in your family would you like God to draw closer to Himself?
- How often do you pray for your unsaved loved ones?
CHALLENGE:
If you haven’t done so already, I would encourage you to make a list of unsaved family members and friends and pray for them each day. Ask God to open to their eyes to the truth of His Word and who He is. Ask God to soften their hearts, open their minds and ask Him to draw them closer to Himself.
PRAYER:
Heavenly Father,
Thank you for choosing me to be your son/daughter. I pray for the salvation of _____________. Please open his/her eyes to the truth of who You are and what Your Word says about You. Please put Christian’s in ______’s life so he/she can know you more. Soften ________________’s heart and open ______________’s mind so he/she knows You more and will have eternal salvation. Please draw ______________ closer to Yourself and he/she will not only accept You as his/her Savior, but _________ will ask you to be the Lord over every area of his/her life!
I pray all this in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Let’s Stay in Touch!
If this blog has helped you in any way or if you have a specific question regarding being a first-generation Christian or one of the first Christians in your family, please email me at Denise@DeniseLBeyerle.com or go to my website www.DeniseLBeyerle.com and go to the CONACT page.
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